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Valentine’s Day Jokes to Get You in the Mood … for Laughs!

No matter your relationship status, these jokes are guaranteed to put a smile on your face!

By Tara Hans Updated: February 12, 2024

Liliboas/Getty Images

Love is in the air! Whether you’re in a committed relationship, single and ready to mingle or flying solo with your gal pals, February 14 is the time to celebrate your closest bonds. And what better way to do so than with a bottle of wine, some chocolates, maybe a rom-com or two, and, of course…laughter. We’ve compiled our favorite Valentine’s Day jokes to keep you smiling well beyond the holiday. So sit back, take a spin through and feel the love!

For more funny jokes (including our Marriage Jokes That Will Make You Laugh So Hard You’ll Fall Head Over Heels), memes and cartoons, consider subscribing to our print magazine, where we feature funnies in every issue!

And now, on to our best Valentine’s Day jokes…

Q: Why did hte skeleton break up with her boyfriend on Valentine's Day? A: His heart wasn't in it!

Valentine's Day Jokes: Dog with flower in his mouth saying, "I'm bringin' sexy back." — Rosa Maria Garza, Brownsville, TX

Cartoon of unicorn at dating site with caption, "I'm just looking for someone who believes in me" — Bob Vojtko

Q: Why did hte dad approve of his daughter's goalie boyfriend? A: He was a real keeper!

"Valentine's Day—the one day very year that we celebrate the miracle of same-day delivery." Seth Meyers — NBC/Contributor/Getty Images

Q: Who is Cupid's favorite rock band? A: It's a toss-up between Kiss and Heart!

Valentine's Day Jokes: Boy kissing girl on cheek with caption, "You think these gas-station flowers earn you a kiss?!" — Shannon Banal/Getty Images

Q: Who always has a date on Valentine's Day? A: A calendar!

Valentine's Day Jokes: Cartoon of boy handing mom chocoalates with caption, "Happy Valentine's Day, Mom. I ate all the ones you wouldn't like—there are two left" — David Quintanar

Q: Why do melons have to get married in churches? A: Because they cantaloupe!

Valentine's Day Jokes: Baby Cupid with caption, "Cupid: Because nothing says "romance" like a short, half-naked toddler with a deadly weapon" — kiankhoon/Getty Images

Valentine's Day Jokes: “If you’re in a relationship, Valentine’s Day is a chance you can celebrate with each other, and if you’re not in a relationship, it means you don’t have to share your chocolate with anybody!” —Ellen DeGeneres — Frazer Harrison/Staff/Getty Images

Q: Why didn't the two dogs want to commit to each other? A: Because they knew it was just puppy love!

Valentine's Day Jokes: Do in free kisses for $1 booth with caption, "Maybe I should raise my prices" — Lyndall Hord/500px/Getty Images

Q: Why do tennis players make the best spouses? A: They know everythign about love!

Valentine's Day Jokes: "Papa John's is offering a heart-shaped pizza for Valentine's Day. It's for the wife who has everything…except a husband who knows what a woman wants for Valentine's Day." —Conan O'Brien — Rich Fury/Staff/Getty Images

Valentine's Day Jokes: What candy hearts look like vx. what candy hearts taste like (photo of chalk) — xjben/Getty Images; MamiGibbs/Getty Images

Valentine's Day Jokes: 7 signs you're a hopeless romantic — Barbara McGregor

Things kids say: Valentine’s Day Jokes edition!

Valentine's Day Jokes, Kids say the Darndest: I was helping my 8-year-old grandson, Curtis, write out his Valentine’s cards for his classmates when he asked, “Why do I have to do this again?” I told him it’s good practice for when he’s older and falls in love. Curtis replied, “If falling in love is anything like learning the times tables, no thanks! Way too complicated.” —Kathy Moeller, South Bend, IN

Valentine's Day Jokes, kids say the darndest: My daughters, Maddie and Clara, made me valentines, but 3-year-old Clara didn’t look too happy when she gave hers to me. When I asked what was wrong, she replied with a pout, “Maddie said making these would be a piece of cake. But there wasn’t any cake!” —April Wheeler, Bridgewater, NJ

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For even more laughs, click through the links below!

Funny Photos That Will Crack You Up — Plus, How You Can Win a $50 Gift Card!

Jokes That Will Give You — And Your Funny Bone — A Good Workout!

Funny Dog Jokes That Will Leave You Howling with Laughter

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