If you’re up on your text acronyms, then you probably think LOL means “laughing out loud” and OMG stands for “oh my god!” For most people, these would accurate — but not for parents. Since moms and dads tend to have their own language, we took some common text acronyms and rewrote them to be more parent-like. Enjoy these funny, painfully accurate modifications.
1. LOL (Laughing Out Loud): Lots of Liquor
When your parent friend asks you what you want for your birthday, LOL is a totally acceptable answer.
2. HF (Have Fun): Hallelujah for Fish Sticks
Chicken nuggets, fish sticks, mac n cheese in a cup…this acronym is basically your way of saying it’s going to be a “heat in the microwave” kind of dinner.
3. OMG (Oh My God): Out for More Groceries
All parents use the OMG acronym far more than they’d care to admit. Why do kids eat so much?! If you have teens, you’re using OMG about twice as often.
4. HTH (Hope This Helps): Harry Potter Themed Happy Hour
What is a Harry Potter themed happy hour? Basically, all the parents in the neighborhood get together and throw Harry Potter on the TV while they can relax with a glass of wine. It works every time. “Hey, who wants to get together for a HTH tonight?”
5. WTF (What the F***): Without the Family!
This is the acronym you frantically send out to all your single friends when you unexpectedly have some time to yourself.
6. JK (Just Kidding): Jesus Karma
Jesus Karma is pretty much a parent’s way of saying “What goes around comes around.” Whether you believe in Jesus or karma, you’re pretty much covered either way. This is often used when parents are complaining to one another. For example: “Don’t worry, JK will take care of it.”
7. LMK (Let Me Know): Let’s Make Kamikazes
When you have a parent friend that has had a tough day, send the LMK message. You can literally get together to make kamikazes (this drink is equal parts vodka, triple sec, and lime juice) or it’s also just a good sign of moral support.
8. TTYL (Talk To You Later): Talk to You at Little League
This is basically a “see you later” to sports parents you know. Little League is the general example, but it’s also code for swim, basketball, football, dance, or any extracurricular activities.
9. POV (Point of View): Puke on Vomit
If a parent says they’ve had a POV kind of day, this means it’s a “puke on vomit” kind of day. This could be quite literal, as in everyone is getting sick and vomiting, or it could just mean a really crummy day.
10. ROTFL (Rolling on the Floor Laughing): Relaxing on the Floor with Legos
This is a parent chill moment. It’s one of those rare times when the kids are playing nicely, and you can quick check your email, Facebook, or play Words With Friends.
11. CU (See You): Can’t Urinate
This is an acronym of a parent calling out for help because they can’t get a moment’s peace. Sometimes you’ll see it as CUA (Can’t Urinate Alone) or otherwise, CU is an acceptable format.
12. IDC (I Don’t Care): I Have Double Coupons!
If you have a parent friend that uses this, you definitely want to be their friend. They’ll help you save money faster than a toddler can disappear in the grocery store.
13. ICYMI (In Case You Missed It): In Case You’re a Mom Interested
You’ll see this one a lot on mom Facebook groups or chats. It’s usually used when selling used goods or trying to find like-minded parents.
14. ETA (Estimated Time of Arrival): Estimated Toddler Awakening?
For parents who are trying to coordinate a meet-up, they’ll use the ETA acronym, essentially asking when their toddler is going to wake up from nap so they can plan accordingly.
15. HF (Have Fun): Hot Father
This one is often used by moms in the group, alerting another mom of a hot father approaching.
16. IDK (I Don’t Know): I Have Demon Kids
Here’s another acronym used after a hard day. It quickly and easily conveys to your parent friends how your day has gone.
17. DGMW (Don’t Get Me Wrong): Don’t Give Me Whining
This is an acronym parents use with the text-savvy kids. Whenever the kids are trying to text argue with their parents, they’ll often get this back in response. It essentially means, “Drop it!”
18. YOLO (You Only Live Once): You Obviously Love Olives
YOLO is secret code for “Want to meet up for a drink?” It’s a nod to a love of dirty martinis, but any drink may be consumed when you schedule a YOLO.
19. FC (Fingers Crossed): Family Crisis
This is a quick message sent when you’re dealing with something and aren’t available to communicate. The word “crisis” could define running out of ketchup or a child waking up early from a nap; it’s usually not a crisis at all.
20. FB (Facebook): Family Bonding
This acronym may be laced with sarcasm. “Oh, gotta go. It’s FB time.”
21. WFM (Works For Me): Works for Mommy
Here’s another one edged with sarcasm. This is used by people who enjoy talking about themselves in third person.
Stacy Tornio is the author of The Kids’ Outdoor Adventure Book and the mom of two adventurous kids. Together, they like planning vacations centered around the national parks.