Already have an account?
Get back to the

These Santa Jokes Are So Funny Even Scrooge Will Laugh!

Christmas really is the most wonderful time of year! The cookies are baked, the gifts are wrapped, the tree is trimmed and the stockings are hung by the chimney with care. There’s nothing left to do now but wait for the big guy to show up and deliver some of his Christmas magic to your house. While you wait, check out our roundup of the funniest Santa jokes we’ve ever heard — and don’t worry, laughing out loud will not put you on the naughty list!

If you’re looking for more funny holiday jokes, memes and cartoons (including our Funny Holiday Memes Guaranteed to Make You Go Ho-Ho-HA!), consider subscribing to our print magazine. We feature games, jokes and more funny stuff in every issue!

1. A job for every reindeer!

Santa jokes: Q: What does Santa use to clean his sleigh? A: Comet!

2. Santa jokes: Setting expectations

Santa jokes: Cartoon of boy on Santa's lap saying, "Define good"
Harley Schwadron

3. J, K…M, N, O, P?

Santa jokes: Q: Why does Santa have trouble spelling? A: He thinks the alphabet has Noel.

4. The hard truth

Santa jokes: Reindeer confronting Santa saying, "No offense, Santa, but it's not easy for eight tiny reindeer to pull you anymore"
Van Scott


Santa jokes: Q: How do you invite Santa to a party? A: You request his presents!

6. Does the North Pole accept returns?

Santa jokes: Boy disappointed with his Christmas present and caption, "I think Santa read my list wrong

7. The woman behind the man

Santa jokes: Q: What did Mrs. Claus say when he forgot to buy eggs? A: "It was on the list. Did you check it twice?"

8. Efficiency is key!

9. Santa jokes: Hi-ya!

Santa jokes: Q: Does Santa know karate? A: Of course. He has a black belt!

10. Grown-up Christmas list

Handwritten letter holiday meme that says, "Santa, This year all I ask for is a big fat bank account and a slim body. Please don't mix up the two like you did last year. xoxo me"

11. Better take an umbrella!

Santa jokes: Q: What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa as he left on Christmas Eve? A: "I think it's going to rain, dear."

12. New Year’s resolution?

Santa jokes: Cartoon of Santa and elf with Santa saying, "My fitness band is telling me I need to be active more than one day a year."
Jon Carter

13. All hail the queen!

Santa jokes: Q: Who is Santa's favorite singer? A: Beyoncé—because she sleighs!

For even more laughs and smiles, click through the links below!

Funny Holiday Memes Guaranteed to Make You Go Ho-Ho-HA!

These Signs Are So Funny, Confusing and/or Just Plain Weird, You Can’t Help But Laugh

Funny Dog Jokes That Will Leave You Howling with Laughter

More Stories

Use left and right arrow keys to navigate between menu items. Use right arrow key to move into submenus. Use escape to exit the menu. Use up and down arrow keys to explore. Use left arrow key to move back to the parent list.