Imagine that you have a happy go-lucky son or daughter around 16 years old. Out of the blue, he becomes moody, alternating between high and giddy and negative and irritable. When you ask him what’s going on, he says, “Nothing, Mom.”
You suspect that his moods are just part of a normal adolescence until you notice changes in his behavior. Here are some things you might not know about bipolar illness that might be puzzling to you before your child is correctly diagnosed.
Although she is probably very smart, creative, dynamic and charismatic, even seductive at times, these characteristics may mask the illness.
He may feel that he is different from his peers but doesn’t understand what it is about him that is different. Therefore he may hide his fears about what is happening to him, feel lonely, and be unable to ask for help.
There is both pain and terror involved in having this illness. His friends find him humorous and magnetic one moment and cynical and “too much” in the next. This is very confusing and he has a hard time understanding their reactions.
MUST-SEE: Why Your Adult Children Still Blame You When Something Goes Wrong
He may have difficulty expressing emotions and become irritable, easily frustrated, and have outbursts of anger. He has little insight about how her moods and actions affect others.
He may withdraw from siblings and the rest of the family because he can’t trust he’ll be able to manage his moods. He doesn’t like crowds because there is too much stimulation.
His judgment may be clouded, resulting in impulsive behavior and a lack of ability to think through consequences. He may seek out and engage in physically dangerous activities because of an inflated sense of her own abilities and a desire to eliminate emotional pain. He may appear grandiose and think he can do things that others would deem unreasonable.
He may have sleep difficulties: difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep because of an inability to quiet his mind. In the manic phase of the illness, ideas come too fast and there are too many of them to allow his brain to rest.
He may use street drugs to self-medicate both cycles of his illness. However, when drugs are involved, it is harder to manage the mood swings that come with bipolar illness.
He needs a creative outlet to manage his mood swings: listening to music, doing artwork, playing an instrument, being in a band, dance or theater company or participating in challenging physical sports.
When he is diagnosed correctly, he may refuse to comply with a medication regime because he doesn’t want to numb the euphoric state that comes with manic episodes. It may take several hospitalizations for him to accept the ongoing chronic nature of his illness.
MUST-SEE: My In-Laws and I Aren't the Same Kind of People, and We're Both at Fault for the Mess We're In
Bipolar illness does not go away but it is treatable. Your child needs compassion and empathic support from his family, a psychiatrist who prescribes the correct medication and a good therapist who can help him recognize the changes in his moods and how to manage them. Since bipolar is a brain disorder it is important for your child to take his medication, get enough sleep, eat healthy food, avoid drugs and alcohol and stay away from stressful situations.
You can help your child by finding out everything you can about the disorder, educating your family members and treating the disorder like any other. If your child had heart disease you would get him the best treatment you could afford for his heart. This is a brain disorder so help him get the best treatment possible for his brain.
This essay was written by Meg McGuire, a mother, writer, psychotherapist, and the author of five internationally published nonfiction books, including Blinded by Hope: One Mother’s Journey Through Her Son’s Bipolar Illness and Addiction. She is an activist in mental health and criminal justice reform and teaches memoir in southern California.
Boy with Down Syndrome Only Child Excluded from Birthday Party, Distraught Mother Does Something Extreme
This Wedding Portrait Captures Just How Strong Some Family Genes Are
Mom at Walmart Refused Electric Shopping Cart for Her Limping Little Girl, But an Eavesdropping Employee Interrupted in an Incredible Way
Your life just got exponentially better and more stylish now you've signed up for our newsletter. Fabulousness awaits!